Go ahead and admit it – you were just wondering what has been going on lately in the world of airports. Well today is your lucky day! Not only have I gathered up the latest airport news, but I also provide my  (somewhat warped) take on it, free of charge! You’re welcome!

Psst! Wanna Buy an Airport?

Apparently Normal Manley Airport (NMIA) in Jamaica was accepting bids from potential buyers to privatize operations. However, the bidding closed recently… without any bidders! What??? Why in the heck didn’t someone let me know about this?  No, I don’t have the millions of dollars I’d likely need, but hey – think of all the fun I could have had with a Go Fund Me account! And just imagine what an airport owned by me would be like!  Airport shuttles?  Taxis?  Tugs?  Oh heck no! We’re gonna use STAIRS TRUCKS for all of that.  And since airplanes are the only things more awesome than stairs trucks, as owner of the airport I would work hard to get the coolest and widest variety of airplanes to fly in. I suppose I’d also have to take care of mundane stuff like passengers, terminal maintenance, security, yadda yadda yadda.  Did I mention stairs trucks?

Here We Drone Again

A drone was spotted by the crew of a Jet Blue flight near the approach to runway 22 left at Boston Logan Airport on New Year’s Day. Um hello… what about DO NOT FLY DRONES WITHIN FIVE MILES OF AN AIRPORT don’t people understand? Most drone owners are responsible and law-abiding. It’s those few careless/clueless drone owners who are ruining it for all the rest.  The only people who tick me off more than reckless drone operators are people who shine lasers at airplanes.  Speaking of which…

LA Tops the Laser List

According to the FAA, there have been more incidents of people pointing lasers at airplanes in Los Angeles than in any other US city – a total of 197 through November of 2015. 197? Are you kidding me??? What the hell is up with that? Seriously Los Angeles, stop!  Just stop it!

Happy Birthday Heathrow!

London’s Heathrow (LHR) airport opened for commercial flights 70 years ago. 70? Wow! Happy Birthday! That’s really something! Except… Well actually now that I think on it, my airport opened in 1929 which makes it 87 years old. How on earth did a medium-sized airport in the heart of “flyover country” manage to get started ahead of LHR? That just doesn’t seem right! Well congrats anyway Heathrow.  And what took you so long? Hee hee hee! Speaking of Heathrow…

Heathrow Expansion Delayed. Again.

Apparently some people are pretty upset that Heathrow has once again delayed making a decision about either adding a third runway, or extending an existing runway. Speaking as an employee of an airport that just built a new runway in 2013 and is in the planning stages of building an entirely new terminal, let me just say that expanding an airport is no small task. Before you can even think about making changes of any magnitude, you must first complete a large number of assessments, engineering reviews, environmental impact studies, wetland mitigation plans… the list goes on and on.  Then you have to figure out how to fund the expansion.  You can’t just jack up everyone’s rates or they’ll simply stop using your airport.  I don’t know how long LHR has been dragging its feet on this and I’m certainly not trying to defend them.  However, I do have to say I’m not at all surprised and I wish them the best!

Screening for Fake Bombs?

A recent Air France flight had to make an emergency landing in Kenya after a fake bomb (made of cardboard and sheets of paper) was discovered behind one of the toilets. This is the fourth incident involving fake bombs and Air France in the last few weeks. So wait… hiding fake bombs on airplanes and scaring the heck out of everyone with them is a thing now? What on earth is wrong with people???  Don’t they have anything better to do?  Airport security is already very busy attempting to make sure no one sneaks real bombs onto planes… now they’re being asked to screen for fake bombs too?  You’ve got to be kidding.  I can just see it now: “Sorry little Suzy, but your licorice could be used as a fake fuse on a fake bomb so I’m going to have to confiscate it.”  I’ve got a better idea – how about pax stop constructing fake bombs and taking them on airplanes!  Duh! And lastly…

Airplanes Play Bumper Cars at ORD

There have been a couple of incidents recently involving planes and trucks running into each other at O’Hare airport. The most recent occurrence happened on Sunday, January 3 in which a fuel truck smashed into the wing of a GoJet flight (operating as United Express). I know what you’re thinking and no, I was NOT at ORD last Sunday night!

It’s no secret that I’m fascinated by airport operations, especially all that cool equipment they use the keep the airfield running.  As a result, I’m sure the Airfield Maintenance (AFM) team keeps extra locks on the vehicle sheds, just to be safe.  So imagine my surprise when my boss announced that my department had been invited on a tour of the airfield. Um… SERIOUSLY???  The AFM guys are either really brave or they totally under estimate my capacity for mayhem.

Our big adventure began with the AFM supervisors picking us up in a shuttle on the ramp right outside our office.  We then went on a drive around the airfield perimeter which allowed us to get a close-up look at the de-icing pads, glycol tanks, fuel farm and ILS equipment.  While they were driving, the AFM supervisors pointed out various systems, facilities and landmarks. They kept saying things like “Does anyone besides Jenn know what an Instrument Landing System is?”  “Does anyone besides Jenn know what RVR stands for?” When they weren’t talking I was bombarding them with questions.  Here are some of the things I learned:

– Airlines are responsible for their own de-icing, but Airport Operations is responsible for directing airplanes into and out of the deicing pads.  The busiest time for this (outside of snow events) is on winter mornings when the first planes to depart have to get the frost removed from their wings.  The rush begins right around 5am or so.

– Airfield Maintenance, Airport Operations, Engineering and ATC meet every Thursday morning to discuss any maintenance or other work that needs to take place in and around the runways in the coming week. (They call this the NOTAM meeting.)  They try to coordinate the work as much as possible to minimize runway closures.

– Airport Operations is in charge of clearing any debris from the runways.  However, if debris is reported and airfield maintenance is already working in the area, they are often called in to handle it.

– At the passenger airport the ILS system and other NAVAIDS belong to the FAA.  This is apparently the norm at many airports.  The FAA flies around to the various airports and tests the equipment to make sure it is functioning properly.  Interestingly, the ILS and NAVAIDS at the cargo and GA airports belong to the airport authority.

– Any wetlands that are disturbed/destroyed as part of airport construction must be replaced by one and a half times the acreage affected.  When the south runway was built in 2013, a wetlands area had to be filled in.  As per regulations, a new wetlands area was established on the south western corner of the airport property.

– Like any other airport, mine deals with its fair share of bird strikes every year.  If the number of bird strikes goes above a certain level, the USDA will step in to assess the situation.  Other pests the airport has had to contend with: mice, moles, voles and groundhogs.  (A few years back they removed over 300 groundhogs from the airfield!) The proliferation of small rodents in turn brings in larger predators, like hawks and coyotes.

– Runways are inspected and maintained regularly.  Cracks are sealed to prevent water from penetrating the runway surface and causing further damage.  Cracks above a certain size (I can’t remember the exact dimensions, but smaller than you’d think) can force the closure of a runway or taxiway.  Likewise, the grassy areas surrounding the runways must be flat and level.  Any ruts or holes (even from something as simple as sending mowers out when the ground is too wet) will force the closure of the runway and must be repaired immediately.

– AFM and Ops work together to handle runway maintenance in winter conditions using the old ATC tower as a base of operations.  There are sensor “pucks” built into the pavement in various locations on the taxiways and runways.  These sensors give information not only about the surface temperature, but also about the composition of the liquids on the surface.  There are also temperature sensors below ground.  If it is freezing above ground, but warmer below ground, they might be able to delay de-icing procedures. As one of the supervisors put it, managing runways in the winter is part science and part art form. (Salt is NOT used to deice runways as it is very corrosive to airplanes.)

– Plows with metal blades are used to clear the taxiways and the apron.  These plows can remove the snow very effectively.  On the runways they have to use blades with castors and rubber bottoms to avoid ripping out the in-ground runway lights.  (If a light is ripped up it creates a hole in the runway which means the entire runway must be shut down – not good!)  These plows cannot clear snow as effectively, so they are used in conjunction with brooms.

– Because it is fenced off and does not have public access, you do NOT need a CDL to operate a plow on the airfield! However, most AFM employees do have their CDL licenses so they can plow the streets and lots around the airport.

Our tour of the perimeter concluded on the northern side of the airport near the AFM facilities.  We disembarked the shuttle in a large, mostly empty tie-down area where several pieces of equipment were waiting for us, including a snowplow and a broom truck.  We were then told to choose a vehicle and hop in.  They even said we could drive if we wanted to!  As you might imagine, I was beyond excited!

Having already sat in a plow I decided to climb on board the broom truck.  A very nice man (whose name I forget) drove me around and showed me how the broom works.  I can only imagine what operations and ATC thought at the sight of a bunch of accountants and finance people tooling around the perimeter roads in heavy equipment.  Although I was seriously tempted, I opted not to drive.  Remember how ruts in the grass can shut down a runway?  Yeah, that would totally be my luck!

Once everyone had a chance to check out the airfield equipment we hopped back in the shuttle with one supervisor while the other supervisor hopped in a truck ahead of us.  To my amazement he proceeded to contact the tower and request permission for us to drive up runway 28R-10L.  At this point I officially lost my mind.  Ever since I started my job nearly a year ago I have DREAMED of getting out on one of the runways, but never really expected it would happen. Next thing I knew we were cleared onto the runway and off we went. Oh. Heck Yes!!!!! A Delta plane was taxiing towards the entrance of the runway and I can only imagine what the pilots thought when they saw us drive by.

FO: “Tower, this is Delta 123 – I’d like to report a rogue shuttle bus on runway 28 Right.”

ATC: “Roger Delta 123. That’s the accounting and finance department.  They’re… um… conducting an inventory audit of the airfield. That’s right – all fourteen of them have to be driven up the runway so they can confirm it exists.”

Even more hilarious is the fact that we didn’t drive straight up the runway.  Oh no – we were weaving around because the AFM Supervisors were trying to find the sensor pucks to show us what they look like.

FO: “Tower, this is Delta 123 again –  are you SURE that’s not a drunk shuttle driver on the loose?  They’re weaving all over the place!”

ATC: “Um… Negative, Delta 123. They’re… um… counting lights.  Yes, that’s it.  You know, as part of the audit.”

We exited the runway where instructed but the supervisors weren’t happy because they hadn’t been able to find any of the sensors, so we got permission to cross the runway where we finally located one of the pucks on the taxiway.  At this point we had made almost a full loop around the airport property so the shuttle took us the short distance back to our office and the tour concluded.  As you might imagine, I was on cloud 9 the rest of the afternoon.  What an awesome experience! This definitely ranks up there as one of the coolest things I’ve gotten to do as part of my job. Now all I need is to get behind the wheel of the stairs truck! And get a tour of the airfield at the cargo airport!  And watch them unloaded the 747-8 cargo planes! And get inside the ATC tower!  And…